Review by: TOModera
Hey all! After a few busy days, a bit of a stomach hiccup, and working on some of the most dull work, I’m actually starting to get back, and what better way than to discuss something I’m blatantly blind about.
Larceny Very Special Small Batch is a tribute to a story that Pappy Van Winkle told his granddaughter about the creator of John E. Fitzgerald, the creator of Old Fitz, which was eventually sold to Pappy.
Short story shorter, according to Sally Van Winkle, Fitzie was a bonded treasury agent in charge of collecting taxes, and would steal himself the best bourbons he could find by using his keys. As a funny old guy, Pappy added in wheat instead of Rye to make a softer profile.
Because… I guess Old Fitz had a softer profile? Man, you know there’s some slash fiction out there with those two after I said that. Some Deep South Action, if you get my hint.
And that leads us to this whisky, which also uses wheat as the secondary grain instead of rye to give us a softer, rounder profile (too easy).
Well, before I really insult everyone by inferring True Blood should have been about Distillers instead of Vampires, let’s see how this one tastes.
Distillery: Heaven Hill Distillery.
Bottler: Distillery Bottling.
Region: Kentucky.
ABV: 46%.
Age: Unknown
Cask type: Virgin Oak.
Price: N/A in Ontario
Color: Brandy
Nose: Honey, nutmeg, red licorice, sour funk, light melon, peanut brittle
The initial honey blast is really nice. As are the sweeter notes, with just a tiny bit of fruit.
That said, there’s a sour funk. Like a Lemon Guitarist, it just doesn’t work with the rest of it. Stands out. Doesn’t really have hands. No one knows how he got the guitar. It’s really not that great.
Taste: Peanut butter, brine, dill, nutmeg, butterscotch
Yeah, if you want to know what this tastes like at first, go make yourself a pickle and peanut butter sandwich.
Don’t worry, we’ll wait..
Okay, you made it? Now take a giant bite.
Tasted pretty fucking bad and odd, eh? Yeah, I wasn’t really jiving with it as well. Eventually the peanut butter taste went away, however I’m not the biggest dill/brine fan so… yeah.
Finish: Dill, almond, pop rocks, sea salt, charcoal
And this finish folks, keeps going. Forever. And ever ever. 5eva.
Like I said about the taste, the dill isn’t really a selling point for me. It is smooth, and I can pick out flavours I enjoy, but that dill… it just won’t fucking die.
Why won’t you die, you fucking weed! Why! WHY!
Conclusion: It’s because I made reference to legendary men who started Bourbon legacies banging one another, isn’t it?
Seriously though, this has elements to it that I enjoy. It’s smooth, well done, has a good Abv., and the finish is impressive. It just also has these elements that are awkward. Not “it ruins it” awkward, more so “I won’t be buying a bottle” awkward, as there are other whiskies I’d prefer.
Final Score: 73.
Scoring Legend:
- 95-100: As good as it gets. Jaw-dropping, eye-widening, unforgettable whisky.
- 90-94: Sublime, a personal favorite in its category.
- 85-89: Excellent, a standout dram.
- 80-84: Quite good. Quality stuff.
- 75-79: Decent whisky worth tasting.
- 70-74: Meh. It’s definitely drinkable, but it can do better.
- 60-69: Not so good. I might not turn down a glass if I needed a drink.
- 50-59: Save it for mixing.
- 0-49: Blech.
Malt Runners 